Since this semester started, and I have come to conclude this would be my last term of undergraduate studies, I have been looking for venues to use my interests and experiences to fit it into the ideal career. Like every other kid at AU, that is to work for the State Department. Which, in that effect, I am still waiting for my clearance which soon the wait will be over I hope, as my classmate in my GW grad class is helping me expedite. I relearned the value of talking to new people as I somehow became slightly overcome with shyness during the past few months. Grad school is all about networking, and the people in my class are from the military, Dept of Defense, NASA, Japan Space Agency or whatnot, etc. As the class takes a look back into early space history, it was not about the scientific exploration; it was for prestige against the Soviet Union during the Cold War era and for military defense/satellite technology.
So I looked up government jobs in a new light that what I want was international space diplomacy, though would find those means through venues such as the DoD. There was a job posting that basically had my qualifications of my IR major as a foreign policy and security manager at that department, with starting salary of six figures. Whether or not I need six figures is another story, but it was amazing to know that I fit in the description, though I probably lack the paid experience in the field to be hired.
Then when going on to imagine what I would do with a six figure income (of course a good portion deducted after taxes), I would first pay off all my student loans (which I thankfully did not accrue as much as others), give a good portion of it to my parents to pay off some of their mortgages, put in a down payment for my own place, and for my friend's sanity so he wouldn't need to drive me around all the time, a car. The rest I'll give my friend to help me reinvest- I guess those are the pros of having so many economics and finance major friends. I'd then throw a portion of it towards education, especially in study abroad, as that was the major focus of my life that helped me meet the people I know today. People shouldn't be separated by borders.
After looking at all the design sites, I'm ready to decorate my own place into a hip, stylish, practical and homey area, not dominated by typical trends of boring furniture. I just wish I had some more artsy friends in that aspect as most of my friends are going into practical fields, lol, where all the asians (well minus me) are going to med school.
Well, that's my dream world in the pursuit of happiness. Then as my career advisor asked me as we talked about applying for the Pickering Fellowship- if you do the DoD road, is that something you really want to do? Or would you be satisfied in the State Department? The foreign service was the road I aimed for, yet as I look some more, there are many other options. And those roads, once I've got my foot in the door, would be quite interesting to explore. Nonetheless, its a career commitment and by December, life will be different.
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Saturday, September 22, 2007
The people around me
I've come to realize every so often that my groups are friends are so varied and diverse, as are my interests. Yet, when bodily functions break down, everyone ends up the same way- vulnerable.
My two usual busy days are Mondays and Thursdays, as those are the only days I have class. This Thursday, not only did I have 3 classes (2 regular, and 1 block that all the way downtown), I went downtown to the China Working group forum to hear some senators speak about US-China relations assuming it to be related to my research topic, then went all the way back to AU for my class, which I caught the last 5 minutes of. Then at noon, there was a Beijing reunion since the director of the study abroad was in town. I met up with my friend and classmate there, which upon that time, he fell over, hit the table, and convulsed into a seizure. With a mixture of late night studying, ciggerettes, lots of caffeine, lack of food for many hours, and most likely another ingredient, all mounted up to his first seizure that was longer than normal ones. While my friend and director kept watch over him as he foamed in the mouth and had blood coming out as well (from biting his tongue), I called 911 for the first time-and soon enough, the ambulance came.
15 minutes later, I had a drugs and behavior quiz, all to help digest what had happened. After, I went all the way to the other uni's library to prepare for my class, and for 2 hours, listened to my professor lecture about the diminishing NASA budget. My day didn't end yet; I went home to grab the takoyaki maker, walk to my Japanese friend's apartment for her bday party, not only help prepare the food, but also celebrated, and by midnight, called it a night. Talk about exhausting.
Within one day, there were many different groups of people I associate with- and it comes to a surprise for me sometimes that people are all linked to one thing- life. The seizure made my friend see his daily activities in a different light, as I saw how easily people's behaviors do have consequences. It all comes down to the fact we are indeed all human. No matter which country they come from, how rich they may be, or how healthy they may appear to be, our bodies may one day just decide to shut down and need that break. Whether it becomes death or terminal, a scare in our everyday lives do make us reconsider what is valuable to us- whether we have lived the fullest currently (and also consider health and not take nonprescribed drugs) or will our past actions still haunt us today and continue to do so in the future. In terms of health, I have heard how its best to take care of our bodies now, as it will catch up to us in the future. As for the rest, it is best to make amends now, and to not dwell on past mistakes- rather learn from them and move on with those experiences for the best in the future. Hopefully my friend has learned from his concoction of late night studying, and found ways to prevent something like that from happening again to his body.
As much as I care for all my friends and I know that is something I'd worry about since he is a friend of mine, it is not something I want to add onto my full plate.
My two usual busy days are Mondays and Thursdays, as those are the only days I have class. This Thursday, not only did I have 3 classes (2 regular, and 1 block that all the way downtown), I went downtown to the China Working group forum to hear some senators speak about US-China relations assuming it to be related to my research topic, then went all the way back to AU for my class, which I caught the last 5 minutes of. Then at noon, there was a Beijing reunion since the director of the study abroad was in town. I met up with my friend and classmate there, which upon that time, he fell over, hit the table, and convulsed into a seizure. With a mixture of late night studying, ciggerettes, lots of caffeine, lack of food for many hours, and most likely another ingredient, all mounted up to his first seizure that was longer than normal ones. While my friend and director kept watch over him as he foamed in the mouth and had blood coming out as well (from biting his tongue), I called 911 for the first time-and soon enough, the ambulance came.
15 minutes later, I had a drugs and behavior quiz, all to help digest what had happened. After, I went all the way to the other uni's library to prepare for my class, and for 2 hours, listened to my professor lecture about the diminishing NASA budget. My day didn't end yet; I went home to grab the takoyaki maker, walk to my Japanese friend's apartment for her bday party, not only help prepare the food, but also celebrated, and by midnight, called it a night. Talk about exhausting.
Within one day, there were many different groups of people I associate with- and it comes to a surprise for me sometimes that people are all linked to one thing- life. The seizure made my friend see his daily activities in a different light, as I saw how easily people's behaviors do have consequences. It all comes down to the fact we are indeed all human. No matter which country they come from, how rich they may be, or how healthy they may appear to be, our bodies may one day just decide to shut down and need that break. Whether it becomes death or terminal, a scare in our everyday lives do make us reconsider what is valuable to us- whether we have lived the fullest currently (and also consider health and not take nonprescribed drugs) or will our past actions still haunt us today and continue to do so in the future. In terms of health, I have heard how its best to take care of our bodies now, as it will catch up to us in the future. As for the rest, it is best to make amends now, and to not dwell on past mistakes- rather learn from them and move on with those experiences for the best in the future. Hopefully my friend has learned from his concoction of late night studying, and found ways to prevent something like that from happening again to his body.
As much as I care for all my friends and I know that is something I'd worry about since he is a friend of mine, it is not something I want to add onto my full plate.
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Sometimes we are fortunate
Sitting on my comfy bed typing this, I earlier chatted with my roommate from China (roommate #2 that is). He is from the Congo, and with his philosophy on life and the way he reminisces of the past, it would be hard to imagine his country back home is so dangerous. Usually in his drunken stupor, he would chat with me on gmail when he's online (or I would assume since he always goes "hey Stephany!"). Usually we'd just miss each other since I was away or he just signs off. The best roommates I have found so far were the ones older than me, and have wisdom to bestow upon me with the way of life.
This time, we finally had the chance to chat, and as usual, I assume him drunk. Different from the usual conversations, this time he asks about my family. Rather than exactly waiting for my answer, he goes to tell about his. His older brother disappeared several weeks ago. At first I thought he meant his brother ran away from home. But it didn't sound so. And the only thing his family knew was that he was taken away by guys in the national army uniform.
When I read that, there was no way I could relate to his problems. I felt his pain, the connection of family, but what is one to say about a sibling being taken away in the midst of the danger zone? If I recall correctly from when I lived with him, I remember him mentioning another one of his siblings had passed away earlier too.
I cannot imagine how people would barge in and kidnap me from the safety of this comfortable bed and surroundings. The only thing my roommate could do was hope. Week after week...hope. Hope for his return. What else can one do?
I was sheltered from such pains by being fortuante enough to be born in the US. I have been fortunate enough my parents have worked their butts off to give me a life where I don't need to live in dangerous neighborhoods. And now, despite my roommate's pains, I have been fortunate enough to open my eyes to the different societies so close to me, and so diverse. Some work all their lives to achieve happy endings to their stories, some were born with it, and some no matter how hard they thought they reached their happy ending, wake up again to a new set of problems. That is life of varying degrees.
This time, we finally had the chance to chat, and as usual, I assume him drunk. Different from the usual conversations, this time he asks about my family. Rather than exactly waiting for my answer, he goes to tell about his. His older brother disappeared several weeks ago. At first I thought he meant his brother ran away from home. But it didn't sound so. And the only thing his family knew was that he was taken away by guys in the national army uniform.
When I read that, there was no way I could relate to his problems. I felt his pain, the connection of family, but what is one to say about a sibling being taken away in the midst of the danger zone? If I recall correctly from when I lived with him, I remember him mentioning another one of his siblings had passed away earlier too.
I cannot imagine how people would barge in and kidnap me from the safety of this comfortable bed and surroundings. The only thing my roommate could do was hope. Week after week...hope. Hope for his return. What else can one do?
I was sheltered from such pains by being fortuante enough to be born in the US. I have been fortunate enough my parents have worked their butts off to give me a life where I don't need to live in dangerous neighborhoods. And now, despite my roommate's pains, I have been fortunate enough to open my eyes to the different societies so close to me, and so diverse. Some work all their lives to achieve happy endings to their stories, some were born with it, and some no matter how hard they thought they reached their happy ending, wake up again to a new set of problems. That is life of varying degrees.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
My senioritis has fortunately come to an abrupt end
As today was the final day to add/drop courses, and I blamed my security clearance at the State Dept internship my excuse to put life on hold, I wandered down to the finanical aid office to see if there was any enlightenment on my financial decision making. I could technically graduate in December, as that was my much debated decision, or spend about $4,000 in loans, take some classes, and graduate in May. Though the financial aid advisor assured that I would be covered for all 4 years as long as it is for my undergraduate coursework, she sat me down in her office, only to then give me a good slap of reality and shove my hesitant self through the doors of the real scary world out there.
I don't think I ever exactly identified my daily debate as being afraid of hitting the real world until she specifically pinpointed it out now. And then she went onto telling me to get my lil bottom to the career center to see how I can afford grad school since it appeared I already had a plan, just jumbled it up along the way. Indeed so.
So afterwards with a cleared head and once again changing my stance on whether I should graduate early or linger about (it did change daily), I finally got up the nerve to also check out when the GREs are as well. October 27th. Which is about 1 month and 16 days from now. If I can recall, I believe I spent ages preparing for the SATs and still did not the greatest. fan-tas-tic.
So I go a cracking up my GRE prep book that I open for the first time since purchase, and realized I don't even get a calculator to use for the test. I'm even stripped of my only reason to persuade my dad to get me a new calculator since my brother broke my old one. After a bit of internal whimpering and slight bitterness (though it does save me a good chunk of money...which then goes towards the ridiculous $140 testing fee) I start reading and was surprisingly focused. I think its not too bad, once I started reading. It's almost in layman's terms...giving me baby steps back into reality. If I can continue with this newfound concentrated energy, then I may just possibly do well.
Ah well, probably that TI-83 was made in china anyways.
I don't think I ever exactly identified my daily debate as being afraid of hitting the real world until she specifically pinpointed it out now. And then she went onto telling me to get my lil bottom to the career center to see how I can afford grad school since it appeared I already had a plan, just jumbled it up along the way. Indeed so.
So afterwards with a cleared head and once again changing my stance on whether I should graduate early or linger about (it did change daily), I finally got up the nerve to also check out when the GREs are as well. October 27th. Which is about 1 month and 16 days from now. If I can recall, I believe I spent ages preparing for the SATs and still did not the greatest. fan-tas-tic.
So I go a cracking up my GRE prep book that I open for the first time since purchase, and realized I don't even get a calculator to use for the test. I'm even stripped of my only reason to persuade my dad to get me a new calculator since my brother broke my old one. After a bit of internal whimpering and slight bitterness (though it does save me a good chunk of money...which then goes towards the ridiculous $140 testing fee) I start reading and was surprisingly focused. I think its not too bad, once I started reading. It's almost in layman's terms...giving me baby steps back into reality. If I can continue with this newfound concentrated energy, then I may just possibly do well.
Ah well, probably that TI-83 was made in china anyways.
Tuesday, September 04, 2007
The Bodies Exhibit- Made in China
There is a great way of dehumanizing society- by taking dead bodies without the person or his/her family member's previous consent, and then artistically stripping them down to nerves and muscles. Feeling naked yet?
A few friends of mine went to the Bodies Exhibit down in Rosslyn, Virginia where they saw bodies of muscles held only by bones and the process of plastination in various positions- playing basketball, giving themselves a high five...etc... At first it sounded like I missed out on a huge lump of grotesque that I would be interested in just to see how much my stomach can handle, but a day later, they dug up some more information about what they saw and found out the crazy lady singing on the street outside of the exhibit was actually right- they were bodies obtained from the Chinese government. So below is a link to 2 articles I briefly found while googling and quoted some of the important aspects that I found.
http://travel.nytimes.com/2006/08/08/business/worldbusiness/08bodies.html
"Here in China, determining who is in the body business and where the bodies come from is not easy. Museums that hold body exhibitions in China say they have suddenly “forgotten” who supplied their bodies, police officials have regularly changed their stories about what they have done with bodies, and even universities have confirmed and then denied the existence of body preservation operations on their campuses. "
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BODIES..._The_Exhibition
"The cadavers were donated for research by the Chinese government, because all the bodies at the time of death allegedly had no close next of kin or immediate families to claim the bodies."
"Due to the fact that the cadavers featured in the exhibition are Chinese in origin, critics suspect that some or all of the bodies may be those of Chinese political prisoners or Falun Gong practitioners, who may have been subject to arrest and execution without due process, in order to be sold as cadavers.[2] These critics cite previous accounts of Organ harvesting in China and the questionable state of Human Rights in the People's Republic of China.
There have also been legal process problems with these displays. State Anatomical boards normally oversee the handling of bodies for medical purposes and have objected to the lack of oversight for bodies for public display. Dr. Todd Olson, director of the Anatomical Committee of the New York Associated Medical Schools (NYAMS), suggests that without state or federal laws “you have no documentation of who this is”. In addition, there are claims that the exhibit of bodies for commercial profit has reduced the donations of bodies for medical learning."
Being that it's China, I can very well believe that they pull off stunts like this that will only further strengthen the black market and other money making schemes. I've heard of crazy stories where Falun Gong members have been killed for their organs since they have a cleaner body. When I told my Chinese friend the rest of the world had eyes on China, and the Olympics is just the test while mentioning the recent health and immoral issues foreigners had with China's products, he claimed he always knew China had cheap and bad quality products that can be dangerous, but felt ashamed of how the rest of the world viewed the country.
My Chinese friends are great and they have helped me so much and it hurts to know that they and sometimes I, too, am viewed differently with being "Made in China". We are jumbled to be participants of the rest of the country's desperate attempts for lax rules and get rich quick schemes. The communism has gotten them working hard, but apparently hard work doesn't pay off in the end like its supposed to, so this becomes the alternative. Sometimes people throw away moral behavior for the sake of survival. Come on, $200-$300 a month per worker? Honestly, that's actually a bit better than being a waitress or security guard in China, but for $20 a piece or so for an exhibit ticket, Dr. von Hagens is definitely making a huge profit off of dead bodies. China probably sold it to him for less than $100 a body.
Now killing political prisoners AND profitting off of them after death. What more can a government want?
A few friends of mine went to the Bodies Exhibit down in Rosslyn, Virginia where they saw bodies of muscles held only by bones and the process of plastination in various positions- playing basketball, giving themselves a high five...etc... At first it sounded like I missed out on a huge lump of grotesque that I would be interested in just to see how much my stomach can handle, but a day later, they dug up some more information about what they saw and found out the crazy lady singing on the street outside of the exhibit was actually right- they were bodies obtained from the Chinese government. So below is a link to 2 articles I briefly found while googling and quoted some of the important aspects that I found.
http://travel.nytimes.com/2006/08/08/business/worldbusiness/08bodies.html
"Here in China, determining who is in the body business and where the bodies come from is not easy. Museums that hold body exhibitions in China say they have suddenly “forgotten” who supplied their bodies, police officials have regularly changed their stories about what they have done with bodies, and even universities have confirmed and then denied the existence of body preservation operations on their campuses. "
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BODIES..._The_Exhibition
"The cadavers were donated for research by the Chinese government, because all the bodies at the time of death allegedly had no close next of kin or immediate families to claim the bodies."
"Due to the fact that the cadavers featured in the exhibition are Chinese in origin, critics suspect that some or all of the bodies may be those of Chinese political prisoners or Falun Gong practitioners, who may have been subject to arrest and execution without due process, in order to be sold as cadavers.[2] These critics cite previous accounts of Organ harvesting in China and the questionable state of Human Rights in the People's Republic of China.
There have also been legal process problems with these displays. State Anatomical boards normally oversee the handling of bodies for medical purposes and have objected to the lack of oversight for bodies for public display. Dr. Todd Olson, director of the Anatomical Committee of the New York Associated Medical Schools (NYAMS), suggests that without state or federal laws “you have no documentation of who this is”. In addition, there are claims that the exhibit of bodies for commercial profit has reduced the donations of bodies for medical learning."
Being that it's China, I can very well believe that they pull off stunts like this that will only further strengthen the black market and other money making schemes. I've heard of crazy stories where Falun Gong members have been killed for their organs since they have a cleaner body. When I told my Chinese friend the rest of the world had eyes on China, and the Olympics is just the test while mentioning the recent health and immoral issues foreigners had with China's products, he claimed he always knew China had cheap and bad quality products that can be dangerous, but felt ashamed of how the rest of the world viewed the country.
My Chinese friends are great and they have helped me so much and it hurts to know that they and sometimes I, too, am viewed differently with being "Made in China". We are jumbled to be participants of the rest of the country's desperate attempts for lax rules and get rich quick schemes. The communism has gotten them working hard, but apparently hard work doesn't pay off in the end like its supposed to, so this becomes the alternative. Sometimes people throw away moral behavior for the sake of survival. Come on, $200-$300 a month per worker? Honestly, that's actually a bit better than being a waitress or security guard in China, but for $20 a piece or so for an exhibit ticket, Dr. von Hagens is definitely making a huge profit off of dead bodies. China probably sold it to him for less than $100 a body.
Now killing political prisoners AND profitting off of them after death. What more can a government want?
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